


Move Along

by cherri_cola (orphan_account)



Series: The Aftermath Of Losing Someone [4]
Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Angst, Character Death, Fluff, Grief, Loss, M/M, Memories, Post-War, Series
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-05
Updated: 2014-11-05
Packaged: 2018-02-23 23:28:02
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,224
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2559701
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/cherri_cola
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Even when your hope is gone, move along, move along just to make it through</p>
            </blockquote>





	Move Along

**Author's Note:**

> Long time, no see! Sorry for such a slow update, I've just been quite busy with school stuff recently considering it is the last term of school and all, so yeah, I hope you enjoy!

Levi looks across the room he’s in and notices that it isn’t exactly clean, not to mention Petra had thrown a bottle of Vodka onto the ground that was now causing the apartment to smell terrible. He grabs a cloth and lathers it with detergent in order to clean the stain that’ll end up on the cold marble floor. He mumbles to himself as he cleans up the area, picking up the shattered pieces of the bottle, the lid of it the only thing left. He starts humming to himself, it was a song that Eren used to always be singing, humming or whistling, he had gotten into the habit a bit himself because it was so weird to have the boy nowhere near him, not with him, not even alive. Levi tries not to cry, tries not to let his weakness show, Eren wouldn’t want this, Eren would hate this, he would hate this. Levi composes himself as he stands up off of the ground and shakes his head, he then gets out all  the alcohol he owns apart from a bottle of vodka and a bottle of whisky and pours all the beers down the drain, this was hard for him, yes, but he needed to do it, he needed to get his life together, he can’t keep living like this. He’ll never completely get over this, he never will, but he can at least try. He smiles slightly as he walks into the bathroom and decides to take the rope he has in the cabinet under the sink and tucks it away somewhere he’ll probably forget and if he really needs to he can get Petra to take it away and hide it from him, it was selfish, but he wanted to keep it incase he really did need it, just for relief. He looks sadly at the photo wall in _His_ room and he grimaces because he will never get over the fact that this is no longer he and Eren’s room, but just his room. He opens the wardrobe where he left his suit and corvettes are and tucks the rope behind everything so that it’d take a while for him to get it so he could possibly have time to change his mind. He then sees that there are bottles and cans around the room and grimaces, how’d he let the damn place get so dirty for fucks sake? He shivers at the uncleanliness of the apartment in front of him and walks towards the closet that’s in the kitchen where he keeps his cleaning materials, he gets out a dustpan and broom and starts cleaning, underneath the carpet and the table tops, he puts all the new found rubbish into the bin he’d set out in the middle of the room. He puts the rubbish into the bin and then gets out a mop and bucket and puts the bin back in the kitchen, he fills the bucket with warm water and then carries it out into the living room, carefully cleaning the ground, getting under the couch somehow and cleaning, it was a weird habit he had, he’d always loved cleaning. Being clean, or cleaning was like getting rid of the past, shaking off all the darkness you’d gained, or the grief you’d felt and you’re washing it away, starting anew, he knew it was a weird way to think about it, but it was how he felt about it. He wipes his hand across his forehead  and looks at the watch on his wrist and realises that it’s now around 3:00 Petra had arrived at his place at around 12-12:30 and it was now actually quite late, he needed to eat, but the bedroom also needed to be thoroughly cleaned, as well as the small gas heater that was disguised to look like a log fire. Levi comes to the decision to clean the fire place before making dinner or ordering it in, he walks into the kitchen and empties all the dirty water he had gathered in the bucket into the sink, while humming that damn song that the kid used to be whistling, singing or humming. He couldn’t stop, it still felt weird that he no longer heard Eren singing in the shower and knew he would never hear it again. He smiles, _You can never push these memories away Levi, they’re important, you can’t just pretend that Eren wasn’t apart of your life._ He thinks to himself and he nods, embracing the memories that surrounded the apartment he had with his boyfriend. 

 

*~*

 

Levi’s eating out on the small balcony and he looks outside across the city’s landscape, the lights making the stars invisible to him, the noise drowing out the natural sounds, he hates the noise of the city, he just wants to be quiet. He wants to move away from the small apartment and he can’t bring himself too, for two reasons, one being this is where he shared his home with Eren, another being he didn’t have the money, he had taken a longer than necessary leave from his work, he needs to go back, but he’s considering quitting anyway, he has an idea of something else he could do with his life, he could work his usual job, but he’d have to tell his boss that he might be pulled away as soon as possible. He smiles at himself, he was almost certain that he was going to go through with his idea. Levi feels a warm summer breeze, his hair ruffles in the wind and his now bare arms, which he never let show in public, felt the warm air after what felt like months. 

Levi curls up in bed and cuddles the comforter into his chest, it wasn’t even late, it was only around 11:00 he hadn’t even done much in his free time. He feels his eyes slowly close and embraces the warmth surrounding him, falling asleep.

 *~*

_Levi finds himself surrounded by nothing but white, the whole word was nothing, it was just himself, in a vast white space, then he sees something start appearing somewhere not far from himself. He realises it was the form of the human, it wasn’t just someone he’d met once, no, it was Eren. His Eren, he feels tears forming in his eyes and he runs, he just runs and his lips meet Eren’s,_

_“Eren, I-I thought you w-were dead.” Levi cries, peppering his boyfriend with kisses, on his cheeks, neck and jaw._

_“Hey, calm down, okay? I'm dead, but I just wanted to say that I don’t want you to be like this anymore.” Eren says calmly,_

_“Eren, I-I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have been so…so idiotic to get so bad and sink so low to want to take my life.” Levi says pulling away from his boyfriend and wiping his eyes, trying to stop his overflowing tears,_

_“I’m proud of you Levi, live okay? Live for me as cliched as that might sound, I also wanted to say,” Eren pauses to take a breath, he’s scared the next sentence he says will break Levi, “I’m sorry, I promised I’d come home, come home to you, to us.” Levi looks into Eren’s eyes, sincerity and sadness being conveyed through the green and blue eyes,_

_“You have no reason to be sorry, we both knew it was possible you w-wouldn’t make it.”  Levi says then before he can even say anything everything blurs._

 

Levi wakes up, a melancholy feeling setting in his stomach, his breathing becoming irregular as he lets a small sob, he’d dreamt about Eren, _His_ Eren, his boyfriend. It made him miss him even more, but he had to push through he was stronger than he used to be, he has to accept that, he has to let this go, sometimes he’ll have dreams about it sure and sometimes he won’t, he just has to accept that, he sees his phone going off on the bedside table next to him, it was his alarm for work, he usually worked from home, but today he had to go back and his boss wanted to see him about something. Levi grunts as he gets out of bed, shaking his head, his bangs falling into his eyes. He gets out of bed and puts on a pair of black jeans and white shirt, not noticing how baggy both appear to look on his legs, arms, stomach and hips. He sighs as he grabs his phone from off the table and shoves it in his jean pocket as he pulls his hoodie off of the doorknob and puts it on over his t-shirt hiding the scars on his arms, he stuffs a couple of stray dollar notes left on the table just next to the door into his pocket, he picks up his apartment key as well, he was just about to walk out the door when he remembered he needed his laptop, after all he did help with web design, digital art and advertisements, he did some of that on the side to make a small bit of extra money but he also liked the aspect of web and digital design. He leaves in the apartment and gets in the elevator and hits the button marked _L_ and checks his watch, seeing that it’s around eight in the morning, he had to time to grab a coffee and muffin but that was all, the lift dings as it gets to the lobby, he walks out of the small ground area of the hotel and finds himself happy to be out in the fresh air, considering he has barely been out recently, he gets out his earphones and plugs them into his phone, hitting shuffle on the device, he walks into the small coffee shop where he stops when he would go to work in the mornings, the barista smiles and waves,

“Levi! It’s been a long time since you’ve come in!” She says smiling, already starting brewing his drink and getting out his muffin as well, he smiles at the blonde’s kindness, 

“Something came up, I had leave from work, but I finally think I’m over it now, so you’ll probably be seeing me a lot more now.” He says warmy, passing her a $20.00 note, she smiles and takes it, giving him the change and the bag, 

“I hope it stays that way Levi.” She says as he turns and gives her a wave as he leaves the small cafe.

 *~*

Levi makes it work, right on time, he quickly sets up his laptop in his small window cubicle, he was happy to have the window cubicle. Levi hears someone walking towards him and he immediately knows who, his boss, he’s shaking but he stands up, he could be fired for taking too much time off of work.

“Hello Levi, I just wanted to talk to you about your _extended_ leave.” Mr Hills says, and Levi stands up, 

“S-sir, I’m s-sure y-you’d u-understand, ho-how much E-Eren m-meant to me.” He says, he wasn’t someone to stutter, but if he lost his job he would have no income, he would have nothing for rent, 

“Mr Ackerman, I’m sure you realise the direness of the situation, you haven’t done any work in over a month, I gave you two weeks, you took six weeks off.” Levi feels the anger boil over in his veins, how can someone be so cruel, Levi was going to propose to Eren, they were going to get married, it wasn’t fair.

“Do you know how I feel waking up in the morning, I walk into the kitchen, and then staring at me from the living room, is the ever so small memorial I have for my now dead boyfriend, I’ll tell you how it feels, it feels melancholy and depressing, I was going to propose to him on the day he came home as well, so shut up, I needed that time, and I need more but I also need a form of income, I’m almost broke.” Levi says, channeling all his rage into this, he could see a small look of respect in his boss’ face as his face softened, 

“Alright Mr Ackerman, you can keep your job and if there’s anything else you need to tell me I’d prefer you do it now, I have a meeting in five minutes, I also want you to stay late tonight.”

“Um, I’m considering training to become an army doctor, so I can go away to help others and possibly save lives, so if I do, know that I possibly will be pulled away at any second, and I’ll work as hard as I can in order to make money for myself.” Levi says, thrilled that his boss is letting him stay on working. He opens his laptop and one of the workers looks at him shocked and hands him paper work and documents for his new assignment, he reads it over finding out he has to create a website for a new clothing brand, they’re clothes were quite a gothic theme and pastel, so he drew up the logo for the website on photoshop in order to embed it, he got so engrossed in his work he didn’t realise as time passed by.

**Author's Note:**

> Once again, sorry for a slow update! I just think you should all know that there'll be one more part after this one then that'll be it, the next part will also probably have Petra in it as well, but I myself don't know considering I just got rid of my writers block for this series, I hope you liked it, um some feedback would be awesome as well, if you have nay ideas you could drop in a comment as well if you wanted! Thanks for reading and I appreciate it so fucking much, all of you have put in your time to read my stories and it means a lot to me so thank you! Also if any of you have read the Percy Jackson books (Heroes Of Olympus) I'll be possibly be posting a percico fic, if you wanna check that out!


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